24 Hours of LeMons Detroit Inspections: I-Mark Diesel vs Reliant K Grudge Match

Here at lovely Gingerman Raceway on the shores of Lake Michigan, we’re experiencing some invigoratingly brisk Upper Midwest Spring weather (in other words, howling Arctic winds driving icy needles of sleet right through our suffering flesh) and admiring the collection of 70 or so racin’ machines that have come to compete in the Cure For Gingervitis 24 Hours of LeMons. Now that your LeMons correspondent has stopped shivering long enough to work the keyboard, let’s take a look at some of the more interesting competitors. Back from their Judges’ Choice triumph at the Chubba Cheddar Enduro last summer, the zany Canadians of Red Shirt Racing went to extraordinary lengths to obtain a genuine Sportbak for their Nissan Pulsar. Some members of the team felt that the Sportbak’s added 100 pounds of weight would be too much for their slushbox-enhanced 71-horsepower E16 engine, but the LeMons Supreme Court promised a coveted Class C berth if the team agreed to keep that crucial accessory on the car all weekend. That means the Red Shirt Pulsar will be battling for a class win with the NSF Racing 1987 Plymouth Reliant-K station wagon. This car was purchased and prepped by the legendary NSF and is being handed off from team to team across the country, having now traveled from LeMons races in Texas, South Carolina, and New York before washing up here in Michigan. After this race, the K-car will be heading back to Texas as part of NSF’s infamous, 2.2-engine-killing “K-it-FWD” program. Of all the teams that could have taken on the K-car for this race, the best possible choice had to be the Celica-killing New Zealanders of Apocalyptic Racing. Not content to shoot rods out the block of their hopelessly overcarbureted 22R engine the Apocalyptic guys have adopted the Reliant-K for the weekend. Fortunately, they picked up a spare 2.2 engine at the junkyard (a wise move for a car that has killed two engines per three races so far) and will be ready in case problems crop up with the K’s powerplant this weekend. If you can find a better car, buy it! Also in Class C is the Zero Budget Racing Chevy Chevette Diesel. This car won the Index of Effluency trophy here back in 2011, but Zero Budget brought another car, one that shoves the Chevette right out of the spotlight. Yes, it’s the incredibly rare Isuzu I-Mark Diesel that served as the LeMons Supreme Court’s Judgemobile last year. This car sat in a field for decades before being revived, caged, and readied for its racing debut this weekend. The team had to remove about 50 pounds of acorns, stashed there by squirrels who called the Isuzu home, before installing the cage. The Class C battle stands to be one of the greatest in LeMons history! We’ve also got some fast cars, e.g., the Lexus LS400 of Don’t Mess With Lexus Racing. This car has contended in several Midwest Region LeMons events, even leading races on occasion, and has the reliability and consistent quick laps needed to pull off the an overall win. The Lexus will need to beat the BMW 325 of Bucksnort Racing, among other tough Gingerman vets at this race, so we’ll be watching the leader if we can take our attention away from the Class C race. In spite of the gale-force winds whipping through the paddock, some teams donned their costumes for the inspections. Byte Marx Racing converted their Escort to a Spanish Inquisition carriage. Loose Lugs Racing brought this exceedingly terrible 2.8-powered early S10, complete with puzzling Jack Daniel’s/moonshine-running theme. These guys were using the stack exhaust pipes to warm their hands as we inspected their truck. Yeah, this is a Class C machine. We forced this team to remove the heavy, speaker-equipped plywood tail of their “Huey” for safety reasons, though we hated to cut off the nonstop blasting of “Ride of the Valkyries.” For reasons we don’t understand, LeMons teams keep finding Merkur XR4Tis and attempting to race them. Here’s a new team whose members are about to become much more experienced mechanics. In honor of a well-known Michigan native, we’ve created this special commemorative BRIBED stencil. Check in Saturday night to see how Day One of the Cure For Gingervitis 24 Hours of LeMons sorts out!